Everybody's Gay....

Today with my 14 year old students I had a rather strange conversation.
I was helping my students with a physics project that they are doing and one of the girls suddenly blurted out 'everybody is gay,' I laughed feeling immediately awkward as none of my student know I am gay and we began to talk about this topic.
She began to tell me that, in her opinion, everybody has to pass through this 'gay stage' of life and that at some point we will all pass through the 'gay station' never actually buying a ticket for the gay train!
I was suprised by her attitude as in this society, the one in which she has been raised, homosexuality is not something that is openly expressed or readily accepted.
We continued with this conversation and the three students involved in the conversation were all very open minded and willing to admit that yes, they are aware of the fact that they will probably pass through a 'gay phase.'
They all seemed terribly surprised when I told them that about ten percent of the population are gay and that in the classroom there had to be at least one gay person.
I then saw the other side of this open minded coin when another student who for me stands out as being a lesbian, aggressively responded that she was not gay and would never pass through that stage in her life.
I began to wonder if these conversations make her nervous because she is terrified of being discovered or because she still has not accepted the fact that she is gay.
When I was that age I knew that I had feelings for the same sex, however, I tried my hardest to fit in and did all the appropriate things for a teenage girl my age, there was no way you could have known that I was gay.
With the re-election of Obama in the States and the hope that inspired for women and the idea of equal rights for all, I was filled with hope because I hope that one day kids who are gay or lesbian or are bisexual and are confused, can feel free to accept themselves and be open about how they are instead of trying desperately to hid themselves constantly.
I also wonder if this type of world in which everybody is free and equal will ever exist?
We have made many developments but we also seem to have taken many steps backwards.
I also wonder how a free world would be?
If we were all open and all the taboos, stigmas and labels were erased how would we all co-exist?
Would it be the same or would the idea of individuality be lessened to the point where we were all just the same?
So many questions and so few answers, but I will watch and see how it all works out from my permanent seat on the Gay Train.

D.Mount

A little post of nothing

One month and two weeks, six weeks, forty two days, one thousand and eight hours, sixty-thousand, four hundred and eight minutes, three million, six hundred and twenty eight thousand, eight hundred seconds.

That is the amount of time until I see my family for the first time in one year, five months and ten days.

  

The emotions: excitement, nervousness, happiness, impatience.

'There's no place like home'

D.M

The Perks of Being a Reader

Being an original Perks of Being a Wallflower fan, I am naturally waiting with baited breath to see the movie which has yet be released in Mexico. I have been tempted so many times to watch it online just to tame the curiosity which rages inside but every time I have held back the urges and decided to wait to go and see it on the big screen.

I have, however, watched the trailer a couple of times, read interviews with the director (author) and cast, seen the images and heard all the gossips and excited talk which surround this must awaited for release.

I first read about charlie and his peculiar ways in 2009 when my girlfriend gave it to me for Christmas, two months after we started going out. She gave it to me and I instantly did the unthinkable and judged it by its cover. I lime green, battered cover which was worn having been handed from reader to reader, a faint stain made by a cup or glass graced the first page and I was captivated instantly. I love my books to be in good condition but I also love to have a book that looks like it has lived the experiences that it is going to introduce you to and 'The Perks of Being a Wallflower' did just that. I read the first page which was dedicated to me, with love and hope that this book would change my life as it had changed my girlfriends.

I began to read it that same day and I read all night and into the early hours of the morning finishing the book and thinking 'WOW'. I instantly clicked with the character of Charlie, the experiences that he lived, the type of people he was surrounded by, the unrequited love, and all the problems that are associated with being a misfit trying to deal with the horrors of teenage life.

I read the book twice more as I flew home from Mexico on New Years eve and found something new each time. When I returned home I slept with the book under my pillow, brought it with me everywhere I went, and read it 4 more times as I wandered through the university campus feeling a little bit lost.

Charlie, Sam and Patrick accompanied everywhere I went. I spent a lot of time thinking about how our teenage years affect us and how they have the potential to shape us into the adults we are.
Now, as the movie is set to be released I wonder if this epic novel of our times will become nothing more than a movie to replace Juno as the top alternative film of recent years. If Charlie will become the new Edward Cullen as the  teenage heart throb and if Sam will now become more than just that sensitive girl who guided Charlie through so many experiences.

From what I have seen of the trailers Charlie is not the awkward soul I imagined him to me and Patrick is way too openly gay. This novel was an epic tale for all the 'Patricks' in the world, the gay boys dating the most popular jocks and hiding themselves so cleverly and suffering every stop of the way.

Perhaps I am being far too judgmental, considering the fact that I have not yet seen the movie, but this book is a treasure I hold close to my heart and I worry for its safety and well-being as it is released to the general public to be turned into 'just another teen movie'

I feel pretty and witty and gay!

The pressure has finally landed on my shoulders. The pressure I did not think would land. Having taught in the seem school for a year, achieving goo results with my students I am now drowning in a sea of ridiculous rules, expectations and struggling against the tide of the most ridiculous educational system I have ever seen.

Bringing in this new system was supposed to be innovative but when you have a group of twelve year old who can barely say the names of the body parts correctly it is a little bit difficult to teach them literature, critical analysis, independent thinking, science, geography and biology through English.

This marvelous cocktail mixed with a dash of homesickness is doing wonders for my mood, as you can imagine, today is only Monday and I am already counting down to Friday.

The worst thing is and possibly this most effective evidence of my loathing for the system is that on Saturday I will be having surgery to remove a wisdom tooth. When a school system and work load cause a dental extraction to be the highlight of your weekend, there may be something wrong!

On the other hand I have students in another school are fantastic, attentive, interested, fluent in English and willing and wanting to learn, they brighten my day and make me laugh even when the idea of laughing or smiling does not appeal to me!

I am also so fortunate to have the love of my life by my side, healthy, happy and always supporting me and helping me work, inspiring me to do my best even though it may be tough some times. 

Without this gorgeous girl I would be lost. Just like I was 3 years ago before I met her.

I have also been thinking a lot about how accepting the people in a work place would be if they new that my co-worker and I were gay? I read some true life stories on line, I have seen how accepting my girlfriends work place have been but still I wonder whether or not they would be so accepting where I work?

Today one of my students asked if I was available, I told her 'No', she proceeded to ask if I was in a relationship, I replied 'Yes', naturally in a classroom of gossipy girls the questions started and all I wanted to do was scream HER name is J, she is the love of my life and she is the most beautiful person in this world!

I had a similar experience later that day with my other students who wanted to know what is my type, of course they meant what type of boys, or should I say men, I always answer that I have no type. Today they asked who is your favourite artist...physically, I felt it would be inappropriate to say Pink and reveal my true rainbow colours so I said nothing.

Anyway this begs the question, how accepting are people of gay co-workers?

D.M